MUSIC! Fact or Fiction?

Duh. It’s fact! Anyone who doesn’t get that is an idiot. Seriously. Music exists. For all of you non-musical people, a brief history of music.

Music has been around for a really, REALLY long time. You know how old that really old guy down the street is? Longer than that. Heck, it’s older than that big tree over there. It’s been around since humans came around. The first caveman probably was all like “ugga ugg!” in a tune and decided he liked it. However, the first written music only came around in about the 1000s. From there, we’ve been through many ages of music and styles, and they’ve all been pretty good. Besides a few of them…

Brief history over. So. As you probably can’t tell, music has been around for as long, or longer than the human race. (seriously. BIRDS!) Anyway, music kicks some serious ass. Except glorified rhythm. I call rap glorified rhythm. It may be interesting, but all it is is a person, saying how they 1)beat up/killed/hate someone 2)had sex with someone or 3)got drunk/high/stoned out of their mind. (don’t laugh yet rock and roll, you’re better, but same concept.) Essentially, rap is people talking about these things, with a background of heavy bass. Rock and roll at least has melodies and something other than a rhythm! What music should be is something that contains at least three of the following. Rhythm, Melody, Countermelody, lyrics. Rap has two. Can we just call it a rhythm with words now? PLEASE??? Can we stop throwing our money at these people? If not, WHY!